Mothering

(pic from Easter Sunday)

I celebrated my first Mother's Day this year. I look back over the past 6 weeks and see how much I have changed and adapted to this new role I play. I have gone without sleep. I have eaten many a cold meal by myself because Avery wanted to eat then too. I have rocked and nursed and talked and cuddled and cried my daughter to sleep, praying she'd stop crying, wishing I could make it better for her. I have sat by myself nursing while the rest of the extended family enjoys visiting in the next room. I have rejoiced over her first smile, how strong she is and how well she holds her head up already. I have marveled at her newfound ability to track objects. My heart melts when I look at her sweet face when she's sleeping. I love to cuddle with her in the early mornings when she comes to bed with me. Her squeaks and grunts and sighs make me laugh.

My mother celebrated her 25th Mother's Day this year. She dealt with the stress that three babies can bring. She has become a pro at all things newborn. She has taken us to soccer games, orchestra rehearsals, school trips, girl scout meetings, youth group. She sacrificed her time so that we could have a fun childhood. She put her own desires aside to make sure that we never wanted for anything. She worked full time and went to school to finish her degree while raising three girls on her own. My mother sat up at night when we were in high school, to make sure we made it home okay. She risked making us hate her forever by not letting us go to that party or out with that boy. She challenged us, making us think through our actions; she made us work for what we wanted, rather than just giving it to us. And now she is my role model for what a mother should be. I hope that I can be as great of a mom to Avery as my mom is to me.