Jack's Birth, in Pictures

Photo credit goes entirely to Erin Cutts.

A Birth Story

Jack's story is our story, a story of grace abounding. It is a story of redemption, of giving new life and new meaning to a day that could have meant sadness for others, and while those other stories are not mine to tell, the significance of God choosing April 4 as Jack's birthday is not lost on me. God's timing is always perfect, and I am thanking Him for making that ever so clear in the sweetest of ways.

Luke and I both come from good-sized families. Four kids in his, five or six in mine depending on which side you look at. I always assumed we'd have three or four kids, maybe even five if I hadn't gone crazy by then. Avery was a pleasant surprise. Eleanor showed up after months and months of trying. We were thrown a curve ball after that and it looked like we were done having children. But oh, my heart longed for another. They wheeled me down the hall with an hour-old Eleanor in my arms, and all I could think was, "I can't wait to do that again." My husband, on the other hand, was done. I was discontent for a long time, learning to adjust to some things which I had not planned for, but in time, though the longing for another baby was still there, the contentment with where God had our family grew.

And then - another surprise. A positive test, to which I had randomly taken to ease curiosity. I fell on my knees laughing; laughter quickly dissolved into tears of worry that my sweet husband wouldn't share my excitement, and tears of worry that this good and perfect gift would be yanked away from me. The question we all struggle with: is God really good? Does He really love me? We all want to believe that what's good for us is also what's easiest. We doubt His goodness when the trials come, and for years the trials kept coming in my life. So then, why would He give me a gift that was simple, no testing attached? It took a couple months to shake that doubt and fear.

Luke was ecstatic to learn the news. I waited a couple days to tell him, partly because we had the budget talk twice immediately following the plus sign on the stick. I should never have worried - his reaction was beautiful.

The pregnancy progressed, the fears abated, and we delighted in my growing belly. This pregnancy was exactly the same and completely different than my last two - a little sicker in the beginning, more back pain, but easy in most regards. What was truly different was my attitude. With Eleanor, I read every book about VBACs I could get my hands on. We did a Bradley class and were the only second-time parents in it. I did prenatal yoga every week. I followed the strictest of diets and then had gestational diabetes which tightened the reins even more on what I ate. I talked through my feelings with friends. I processed my disappointment at my c-section and prayed constantly for my labor. But with this one, my third pregnancy, I chilled out. I made a conscious decision to not over think it, and then two weeks before my due date, I worried that I hadn't prepared enough.

Then, all of a sudden, after feeling like I would never have this baby, it was time. A couple days of warm-up labor, a sleepless night full of contractions that went nowhere...I was exhausted. We celebrated Avery's birthday on April 2, and I was convinced that the two would share a birthday. The baby waited. And the baby waited again the next day, holding off so our doula's daughter could celebrate her own birthday. We have a very considerate baby. My mom drove in that day, since we knew the baby would show up sometime in the next day or two, surely. Late in the evening we decided to walk Costco and Target in an attempt to get my contractions in a regular pattern (and do some shopping, of course). It's rather difficult to not be awkward when you have to pause every 8 minutes, breathing heavily, as you stare intently at the econo size jar of olives or spaghetti sauce or the 64 rolls of toilet paper.

My water broke shortly after midnight, not long after I had gone to bed. I had just updated both our doula and our birth photographer, thinking it would be quite awhile before I needed to check in with them again. My eyes flew open, my body flew out of bed, and I desperately, fruitlessly, tried to catch the water with my hands as I ran to the bathroom. Obviously I wasn't fully awake or thinking straight. Luke went from a dead sleep to overdrive in a matter of seconds. I went through three pairs of pants before we made it out the door. We decided to labor at the hospital this time since my water had broken, and last time I had a baby an hour and a half after. We didn't know how fast labor would go, and my contractions had jumped from 10 minutes apart to 4 minutes apart.

We got settled, sat on the ball, walked the hall, tried all the positions my doula, Sara, recommended, and labor dragged on and on. Our doctor was the same one who had delivered Eleanor, my first VBAC, who I disliked then and fell in love with this time - I guess we just needed time to get to know each other. The pain was out of this world. I hadn't slept in two days. The only thing keeping me going was the encouragement of my birth team and the cranberry juice Sara kept giving me.

Bits and pieces of the last hour of labor are perfectly clear to me. Hanging on the squat bar as if my life depended on it. Luke and Sara helping me push. The doctor calmly going about her business of prepping for a baby, which helped me believe it would actually happen this way, as opposed to another surgery. Trying to eek out one more push when all my strength was spent. The uncontrollable urge to birth that baby that overtook me in the last few minutes. Whispering prayers. Or maybe I wasn't whispering them, but loudly lifting them up. Retreating inside, tunnel vision, complete focus. And finally, the most amazing feeling in the world - new life sliding out, ready to greet us.

"It's a boy!" Luke spoke those words and then promptly broke down. Tears were flowing, and that moment is forever my favorite memory. We had kept the gender a surprise, and we had no hopes one way or the other, but what a wonderful, shocking announcement.

Jack arrived almost 7 hours after my water broke, weighing a whopping 8 pounds 15 oz. God's timing? Perfect. You see, my step-dad passed away a couple years ago, and April 4 would have been my parents' 17th wedding anniversary. Jack also arrived on the first birthday of the precious son of my dear friend (and our birth photographer), a little boy waiting to meet them in a few short weeks. Jack's birth brought new meaning and renewed hope to a hard day. And his name? It means "God is gracious".  Yes, He is.

Meet Jack

Jack Baggins Presley, born April 4, 2014, at 6:48 in the morning. 8-15 and 21"

39 Weeks

• I look like I'm smuggling a ball, one of those $2 large bouncy balls at Target. We are well past basketball here. 
• Still not noticing any pre-labor signs.
• I get SO hot at night while I'm sleeping.
• When I sleep, that is. It's a lot of tossing and turning and I'm up at least twice, some nights 3-4x, to use the bathroom. 
• I walk like an 80-yr-old if I've been sitting for too long.
• Trying to stay active, though it's hard and I'm tired. 
• My sister, Michelle, came in and cleaned my entire house for me this past weekend. What a blessing she is!! Now it's just a matter of keeping clutter at bay. 
• So ready and excited to meet this sweet baby!

Mimics

38 Weeks

My turnover day is on Saturday. Another week down. Two more to go (hopefully). 37 weeks was so busy that we forgot to take a picture or document it at all.

But, here I am in all my large-bellied glory!

Yep, that shirt isn't appropriate for public viewing anymore. 

• Braxton-Hicks are increasing, still most common when I'm quiet in the evenings. 
• A few days of bad back pain, but the past couple have been good again. 
• Some minor swelling in my feet after sitting for 2 days at a conference. Almost all gone today after some time with my feet up, a lot of water, and increased potassium-containing foods. 
• Down to about 2 shirts that are long enough to cover my belly. Obviously it's not the one in the picture!
• The baby still looks kind of high. I know they don't drop as noticeably in subsequent pregnancies, but I don't think this sweet one is ready to go yet.

Bumpdate, Week 36

Now that we're a month out, I'm going to do weekly updates, though I fully expect to see April anyways before this baby comes. Avery was 3 days late, and I was induced with her. Eleanor came on her own, one day early (she's my favorite) (just kidding!).

Feel good. Can't believe as of today, we only have 26 days left until my due date. Sounds much shorter when you put it that way.

Braxton-Hicks are increasing, usually at night as I'm settling down.

My belly button is quite prominent this time, which is new for me.

This week I've started freezer cooking to stockpile some food for that last couple of weeks when I don't feel like cooking anymore, and to fill in between meals from friends. Why do I not do this all the time?

We were gifted a steam mop, and I'm in love. I mopped the whole house last night in half the time it used to take me.

I'm becoming my sister - starting a no-shoe policy in the house for this last month, and we are working extra hard to stay on top of clutter control and cleaning. I'm reaching the crazy stage, and thankfully I have the energy for it still.

Scrambling to finish work; was hoping to be done by the end of the weekend, but the office moved and the server is down this week as well as the printers. So. There's that. Let's me focus on home and baby stuff since I can't do much else. :)

Bumpdate, Weeks 31-35

• Still feeling good! I'm so thankful for an "easy" pregnancy. When I passed 33 weeks, I breathed a sigh of relief that I wasn't on bed rest this time around or spending a weekend in the hospital because of a bleeding scare. 
• Looks like I grew quite a bit between 31 and 33 weeks, and again between 33 and 34. Week 35 looks a bit lower, and feels a bit lower to me too. 
• Active baby! At my last appointment, the midwife felt around, found the position of the baby, and before she could put the doppler on to listen to the heartbeat, the baby had flipped sides and she had to find him/her again. 
• Nesting continues. Working on a quilt for the baby and finishing the nursery. Haven't hit the 'crazy' yet (though if you ask my husband, he might disagree). My to-do list grows faster than I can check items off. 
• My mother-in-law is amazing and spent a week with us, helping me paint the nursery and the dresser and cabinet. The dresser is finished; the cabinet needs new hardware still.
• Meeting with my doula in the next week or two - it's officially time to start counting down!
• Still no name for either gender. 
• Sleep is hard to come by - insomnia strikes again.
• Maternity isn't fitting as well this time. Many of my shirts are already too short, but I am about the same size as I was with Eleanor. I wonder if I'm carrying lower, and that's the issue?? I've gained a bit more this time than last but not as much as my first pregnancy, so I'm curious to see how the birth weights differ between all of my babies. 
• Eager to meet this baby!

Monday Musings

• Just some random thoughts to document what's happening at home during this season.
• This week my lovely mother-in-law is in town helping me get the nursery ready. We're painting a dresser and a cabinet, as well as the room, and if time allows, we'll tackle a couple nightstands for the master. Thankful that the weather is cooperating and it's not freezing outside.

• My back - oh my aching back. 

Ha! That gets annoying after awhile, doesn't it?!

• Eleanor has taken to pretending to be Curious George. We watched the Christmas movie a few times this season, and she, rather smartly, noticed that he wears mittens on his feet when he goes outside. One day she walked in with mittens on her own feet and announced that she was Curious George. I laugh every time she does this. 
  
• I'm addicted to the Olympics. Ice skating has always been my favorite, since I grew up watching it with my grandmother. But, I've really gotten into men's snowboarding. Fascinating what they can do!
• I'm in crunch time at work, getting everything ready for the rest of the semester of Sunday School before this baby comes, since I'll be out for the last month of it. Not stressful in the least. :)
• I keep adding projects to my list of things to get done before the baby arrives, but with work, they keep getting pushed off. I'm sorry sweet baby! You'll get your own quilt one day. 
• Avery will start kindergarten in the fall - eep! Where has the time gone? School choice has been made, and we're excited about it. 
• I still have 3 more years with Eleanor, since her birthday is a week after the cut-off. Thankful for the extra time with her!
• The baby is still nameless. We've been playing the name game very casually for months now, but we're having a hard time settling on something we like. It was easier to narrow down the boy choices, but the girl names are harder this time. 
• Eleanor is talking up a storm now, repeating everything we say and quite well. It's like she sat back and watched for a really long time, and chose to start speaking only when she could do it in phrases and short sentences. 
• My pregnancy dreams have been off the charts weird this week. Panic about my other children being hurt, weird body issues, all kinds of strange happenings.
• Braxton-Hicks contractions are picking up. Never noticed them with Avery, and not until the last 2 weeks with Eleanor. 
• My energy is lagging. I'm starting to get to the point of being tired of pregnancy. Not fully there, but I'm ready to meet this baby now (in 7 weeks! No early babies!).

Bumpdate, Weeks 26-30

                                      

                                      

I feel enormous. The pics don't make me look as big as I feel (shh, don't tell me if I'm wrong), so I guess I've got room for this belly to grow, but oh, that scares me. I always have popped early, and I tend to carry straight out, but this time I fear I might topple over by halfway through my last trimester.

I also love the comments people give, and they are on the exact opposite ends of the spectrum. Either I am "tiny" and "look awesome" (I LOVE ALL OF THESE PEOPLE) or I get "how are you still walking?" and "Wow, you're only ... weeks? You have SUCH a long way to go." (I DON'T LOVE ALL OF THESE COMMENTS, BUT I STILL LOVE (MOST OF) THESE PEOPLE)

It'll only get better from here.

I feel great, honestly. My back hurts a bit first thing in the morning and again at the end of the day, but it's been a good couple of months otherwise. Still more tired than my last pregnancies, but this is partly due to keeping up with more children. And I'm older.

This baby is still very wiggly, which is so fun. Unless I'm driving, because then he or she finds a way to press both up and down at the same time, making it really difficult to breathe. My stomach does all sorts of waves and the girls (mostly Avery) got to feel the baby for the first time. It's hard for them to be patient to wait for the kicks, but now that Avery has felt the baby, she loves to sit and wait for it. She'll rest her head on my belly sometimes just to show it some love. So sweet.

Still enjoying not knowing the gender, though I have a strong suspicion one way. Both girls think the baby is a boy, and Avery still REALLY wants a brother. I hope she doesn't cry if the baby is a girl.

Avery has become my photographer for most of these pics. She's pretty good! Better than her daddy sometimes.

I started noticing hiccups during week 29, which is cute the first time. And then...

My lungs no longer expand fully, which means by the end of the day, when I'm full, it's really hard to breathe when I lay down. It takes me forever to get comfortable and fall asleep, but once I do, I'm usually good for the night, which is a huge blessing. Not experiencing as much insomnia as in previous pregnancies.

I always seem to be pregnant during Girl Scout cookie season. I've had to avoid making eye-contact with the Girl Scouts in order to not cave and buy 6 boxes. So far, so good. I've bought zero boxes in an effort to keep my low-sugar diet on track. I have the occasional treat, but those cookies would totally do me in.

10 Weeks to Go!

Bumpdate, Weeks 21-25

The Good and the Bad this month, for posterity:

• Still feeling good, for the most part. Lower back pain kicks in once in awhile, and I wake up with a sore back most morning. I kind of hobble out of bed these days. 
• Exhaustion reigns. I'm more tired this pregnancy than in pregnancies past, and it doesn't seem to be getting any better. 
• Despite that, I love pregnancy. I can't help but feel humbled, this time especially, that God would bless us with this gift of a child.
• This sweet babe is super active. I feel him (or her!) all the time, but most when I'm sitting still or laying down. I love all of the little pokes and jabs, and I'm even starting to see the movement too. 
• My midwives tested me early for diabetes since I had it in my last pregnancy. I failed the 1-hr test, so they brought me back in a few days later to do the dreaded 3-hr glucose test. Which I passed. With flying colors. I felt so amazing the whole time I was in the waiting room, and I sat there thankful for all who had prayed and were praying for me that morning. This was a big change from last pregnancy, when I was the weird sweaty woman in the corner of the lab waiting room. 

My last junk food meal in case my test turned out to be positive for gestational diabetes. It really was as good as it looks here.

• My doc/midwives now do all labwork in their own office, and they have the sweetest lab tech. I adore her. She makes getting multiple needles in your arm and losing a lot of blood a ton of fun. (No lie - she has me laughing the whole time.)
• At my 24 week appointment, they did another ultrasound because they couldn't get a good picture of the baby's heart last time. This made me a little nervous, thinking that something might have been wrong, but praise God, it really was just a positioning issue, and we received some sweet bonus pictures of a more filled out baby. The profile now looks more like the girls' profiles. 

Love this one so much - the baby's hand is up by the face.

• We have traveled every weekend since Thanksgiving.
• With all of this traveling, it's been really hard to get bump pics in. I might have one for 21 weeks lying around here somewhere, but it's been transferred off my phone already. 23 weeks was spent in NYC.
• We celebrated Christmas early with my side of the family last weekend so that we could have all 5 kids together. So much fun to have all the cousins together.
• No weird cravings. Latest snack is celery sticks with sunbutter spread on them. Also made a citrus kale salad the other night that I'm in love with, so this will be appearing weekly on the menu until I tire of it. 
• That above bullet point makes me sound crazy healthy. I'm totally normal, y'all. I went to a cookie exchange party last night and came home with 4 dozen cookies and ate my weight in something called crack dip (shredded chicken, cream cheese, and buffalo sauce, baked in the oven.)
• I've had remarkable restraint on the cookies though. Two days of baking and smelling sugar, and you kind of get over the desire to eat it. Yes, even I can resist sugar.
• I have the tendency to blame anger and irritation and impatience on my hormones. Not everyday is pretty around our house these days. Really, it's my own selfishness and sin. I'm in need of a major overhaul in my spirit.